Assalamualaikumwarahmatullahiwabarakaatuh

As we all already known, all of us have hearts and have feelings, right? and so have I. one day, I met someone in a seminar. the 'someone' that I am talking about is a boy. he is 15. pmr candidate, just like me. at first, he had to sit at the back because there was no more seat. but then, the motivator asked him and so his friends to sit at the front. well, he was kinda handsome. in short, he was my taste.

So, during the seminar, I had been watching him all over the time. I liked his eyes, it was kind 'mata-yang-redup'. when I stared at him, looked into his eyes, my heart melted that time. but unfortunately, he didn't even look at me, even once. not even. what a pathetic!

But I know, even if he looked at me, he would not like me, because I know who I am. I'm not deserve for him at all. when I looked at his T-shirt, I knew that he studied at a boarding school. and from that statement, you should have known that he is a smart person. not like me. but I'm not too stupid, not too clever, my position is just at the middle of clever and stupid. am I like that? maybe.

So, even when the seminar was about to finish, he still didn't look at me. and I.. still hoping he will look at me even a second. I just.. wanted he knew my existence, that's all. but I know who I am, where's my position, and I'm not comparable to him. not at all. I know that I shouldn't think about love when I still study, I just too young to think all about that. but what to do, I have feeling too.. like others.

And when the time had come, I had to left the hall with frustration. I had to. then, I said to myself  "I'm not deserve for you" It was a bit like that laa. I said that 3 times. then, the bus that took us back had come. I got into the bus. and my friend sit beside me. then, I put my earphone to the ear and listened to the music.

"...  never mind, I’ll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you, too,
Don’t forget me, I beg,
I remember you said,
“Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead ... "

I don't know whether I can marry with someone that I love in the future. I don't know, but I hope so. InsyaAllah.